Friday, September 24, 2010

I Guess That's Why They Call It The Blues

Elton John was on to something when he wrote the lyrics-

Don't wish it away
Don't look at it like it's forever
Between you and me I could honestly say
That things can only get better.

I have the blues or what I hope is just the blues.

I can't shake them. Everything seems out of my control.
Maybe it's a 5 day vacation coming to end? Except I have Saturday and Sunday off too.
Or family going back home after having an awesome visit.
It could be knowing that in a few weeks we will have 3 kids living at home in a house that is barely big enough for 2 kids.
I could pinpoint it to having my mom and sister within a half hour drive of our house but not seeing them nearly enough. But that's not it either.
Impending home renovations with not nearly enough time to complete them. Anticipation of a giant mess. I can't say that's why I feel this way.

Having my job move from everything that is familiar. But that's still a month off too.

Nick's performance at school. Grades that need to be better but fearing that he's doing the best he can.

I want to run but I'm not sure where I'd be running to. I can't escape depression. I know this. I guess that's what I'm most afraid of. What if this is depression and not just the blues? I just want it to go away. I want to laugh easily and not just spend my time waiting for the other shoe to drop.

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